Seesaw
by doremimamu
Summary: And they say young love never last. AU


Attack on Titan © Isayama Hajime

 **Little rebel**

 _(Zeke is six)_

His father has remarried. His new mother is nothing like his late mother. To make matters worse, the woman is pregnant and his father brought them all to countryside.

Zeke hates it here. For this particular city boy, adjusting to the quiet, mundane life out of nowhere is like a punishment and he doesn't enjoy being punished everyday.

"Zeke! Let's eat dinner!"

He cringes internally at Carla Yeager's voice, and takes his time walking down the stairs to the dining room.

She is pregnant alright, but the woman is still able manhandle him whenever he throws tantrum. Zeke couldn't help to compare her to his mother.

While Dina was soft-spoken, younger Carla doesn't look very maternal and much more rowdy to his liking. Coming from the working class family, she obviously didn't have advantages Dina had been born with - a point which a 6 years old doesn't have an understanding yet. So he's continuously resisting Carla eventhough she means well.

"You're going to be a big brother very soon. I want you to set examples for your little brother. Here, have some more vegetables."

Zeke glares at his plate _,_ his mind reeling with plans to get rid of them as soon as he has the chance. His annoyance doesn't end there as Carla suddenly reaches to ruffle his hair gently.

"Look at that. Isn't it about time to get a haircut?"

 _Shut up, you're not my mom._

 **She's electric**

 _(Zeke is thirteen)_

There's a knock in the door.

"It's unlocked."

The door opens, revealing a girl in blue dress. Something about her seems different, maybe longer hair and girlier outfit, but then she smiles, and it is familiar.

"How are you, Frieda?"

Frieda comes from his mother's side which makes them cousins. There are her brothers and sisters as well, but Frieda has always been closer to him. Perhaps because they are about the same age, and Frieda is nothing like her father.

"I envy you to escape the city and live here," the thirteen years old tells him, dramatically spreading out her arms, then falls onto his bed. "The city is so dirty - so are the rest of the people."

"Are you talking about your father?"

Frieda's face twists into a grimace. Rumor has it that the mistress whom Rod Reiss has a bastard with lives around here. But Zeke wouldn't know for sure.

Frieda quietly asks him, "Have you met my half-sister, Zeke?"

.

.

.

Frieda tilts her dropping hat every once in a while. Zeke faithfully follows her with Eren tagging behind. Has never explored anything beyond their house and school, he has no idea about this ranch Frieda has told him about.

"Is she my age? Does she like to play war? Does the ranch have horses?"

Zeke rolls his eyes at Eren's question. The boy has been spouting the same questions over and over again. Yet Frieda keeps responding to them everytime with the same gentleness. Being the oldest of five siblings, she is good at dealing with kids.

"Yes, she is. Historia will be happy to meet you, Eren."

When they reach the ranch, a little girl has been waiting near the gate. Blonde, small stature, big haunting eyes—Zeke gets the impression of younger Frieda from her.

"This is Historia," Frieda begins to introduce them. The rambunctious Eren has suddenly become quiet.

"I bring new friends for you, Historia. Let's play together."

.

.

.

They are playing hide-and-seek.

Due to the vastness of the ranch, they set limit to the playing area and divide four people into two teams.

"30... 29... 28... 27..."

Eren and Historia's voice counting backward can be heard from where Zeke and Frieda are hiding.

"Cute, aren't they?" Frieda takes a little peek.

"If you're into annoying brat who doesn't understand the word 'shut up', then yes," Zeke flatly responds.

She peeks out from under her hat. "Don't be so hard to Eren. He's very curious and only has you to look up to."

Zeke frowns. Has she not noticed the little beast can't seem to get off his back? To make his life harder, his father and Carla seem so keen to relegate Eren to him as well.

"Are you going to start brainwashing me, Frieda?"

She looks taken aback but keeps her eyes fixedly on him.

"I envy you to escape the city and live here," Zeke quotes her, half-mocking, half-accusing. "Do you really?"

God, how he _hates_ playing house in the prairie... If his mother were still alive... If his father hasn't been so selfish...

"Stop pretending to care about me."

Frieda touches his knee.

"Zeke," she says determinedly. "If I didn't care, would I still be here today?"

He swallows, finding themselves in the middle of a staring contest. Eren is yelling in the background, but he couldn't make it out, focusing solely on Frieda as she leans closer and closer until he can see green specks on her pupil—

And Zeke forgets to breathe.

He knows what's going to happen next.

.

.

.

"Are you going to marry Frieda?" Eren asks him, wide-eyed and awake.

Sharing a room with his nosy brother is a pain in the ass. His father and Carla insist it's good for their bonding.

"Frieda and I are cousin..." Zeke leaves the 'moron' part unsaid. "Leave me, I'm trying to sleep."

But Eren doesn't care.

"Is that why you kissed her in secret?"

Zeke jolts up, fully opening his eyes. "WHAT—Did you tell someone?"

Eren notes the panic on his brother's voice and shrugs.

"Did you tell someone?" Zeke repeats his question firmer.

"...yeah, I told Armin..." Eren reluctantly admits.

Zeke narrows his eyes, not buying into him.

"I swear!" Eren straightens up. "Armin swore he's going to keep it for himself! He said you are going to have inbred babies!"

Zeke looks at him as if he was a lunatic. There's no point explaining how Frieda and him are distant cousins at best. Shaking his head, he decides to let it go. "Just watch your mouth around Dad and Carla."

.

.

.

Frieda's letter arrives the next day. Her handwriting was messy, reflecting the state she was in.

Her father is sending her to a boarding school. She may or may not come back for some time. Does he mind looking for Historia while she's away?

Zeke looks blankly at the letter.

Who does she think he is? A babysitter?

His eyes skim over the paper. Feeling betrayed, but there is nothing he can do. It's scary how easy for Frieda to get him wrapped around her little finger.

His eyes softens a bit reading the last note.

 _I won't forget this summer._

.

.

.

 **He wonders**

 _(Zeke is fourteen)_

"Eren! Don't get too close to the water!" Zeke warns him.

"What's the point going to the beach then?" Eren counters him, splashing water to Historia who is caught by surprise then quickly retaliates.

"Can you imagine," he turns to Frieda with a sigh, "Going outside when typhoon is coming."

She laughs. "Historia chose a weird place to hang out under this weather. I don't mind though. It'll be an experience."

As they stand side by side, their height difference has become more apparent eventhough only a year has passed by.

Zeke never brought up why they ceased communication after her last letter - not while Frieda acted like last summer has never happened. He also doesn't miss the fact that she checks her cellphone every once in a while like an addict. It makes him want to grab her chin, redirecting her attention to him.

"When are you going back?"

Finally she stops looking at the damn thing and focusing on him. "Tomorrow."

"So soon."

"I'd like to stay longer, but short weekend is all I can get. My exam is coming next week."

"Why the sudden visit then?"

Frieda blinks before she laughs. The sound is infectious, but Zeke can't bring himself to do the same.

"God, you're so forgetful," she says, wistful. Then her cold hand reaches up to him, caressing his cheek bone gently. Tiptoeing, she plants a kiss there. "Happy birthday, Zeke."

She turns away. He turns mute.

The fleeting moment is soon interrupted by Historia, "Frieda, I'm freezing!"

The scent of rain mingles with the sea. It's high time for them to go. So Zeke grabs Eren, dragging his wild little brother half-heartedly while secretly hoping time could stay still.

Beach. Typhoon. Brats. Frieda.

He'd carry the memory of this day for the rest of his life.

.

.

.

 **Devotee**

 _(Zeke is sixteen)_

It's too cold to hang around outside, but there she is anyway, standing alone and crying outside of the stables.

Frieda can be very emotional when she's on quarrel with her boyfriend. During the last two years, Zeke has witnessed the usual calm girl turn into a shrill, hysteric manic yelling at her cellphone. This time she has more reason to because the said boyfriend is breaking up with her.

Zeke watches Frieda's back, remembering of a time when life was simple—they were naive, they didn't hide things.

Times and appearances changed. His hair got longer, his eyesight was slightly deteriorated, but he made it into captain at the school's baseball team. He was also no longer at odds with Carla.

And then at the same time, Frieda became a mystery, a girl who grew up far from her family, who could see the bigger world than the countryside that Zeke has used to live in.

He's tired to see her hurt. But like every other teenage girls, she takes her first love very seriously.

 _First cut is always the deepest..._

"Don't come," Frieda suddenly said, sensing him standing behind her. "I don't want you to look at me when I'm crying."

Zeke steps forward. His hand reaches Frieda's face from behind, gently covering her eyelids, and he leans forward until his chin touches the top of her head.

"I can't help but wonder what is a thing like him doing to let a refined girl like you go."

"You're only nice when I'm going through a time like this..."

"Hey, I'm always nice," he pretends to sulk, and feels the muscles on her eyes raise upward in amusement.

"You've never had problem with girls, have you? They always show up up during your baseball practice. Eren told me. Phone calls, love letters, gifts..." She has stopped crying and chuckles. "All of them wanting to be Zeke Yeager's girlfriend."

 _Why don't you?_ he wanted to ask, but Frieda's action is faster than his tongue. Once a familiar ringtone is heard, she swiftly removes his hand away and fumbles with that damn cellphone on her pocket.

.

.

.

Later that night Frieda calls him.

He just sits in the dark, listening until the dawn breaks. Finally she says, "If only he were like you, Zeke..."

"Yeah..."

 **Maybe**

 _(Zeke is seventeen)_

He lies down on his back, closing his eyes, feeling the warmth of summer. Frieda asks him to wait while she is saying good bye to Historia. This time she is moving even farther. Visiting will be even more scarce.

There are rustles then something dry and light falls upon him. One eye cracks open and the sight of Frieda's smile above him dropping leaves sears into his brain.

She is going to leave tomorrow - farther, harder to reach.

"Would you like some company?" she greets him.

Zeke inhales deeply. "Let's stay here for a while."

She agrees.

They sit under the tree, witnessing the ranch drowned in beautiful orange color before gradually waned into deep blue. Zeke can't help to notice she sometimes checks her cellphone, and that gnaws at him. At seventeen, he shouldn't still dance around his feeling.

"Do you know that I like you?" he asks. His face is as calm as the dusk in front of them.

Frieda remains unresponsive, typing at the cellphone without missing a beat. He's about to reprimand her for how rude she behaves when she suddenly turns to him.

"We are still seventeen," she says. "Nothing is real at this age. You'll change your mind at one point."

"We're not numbers," Zeke says. "And if you want to let me down, don't go easy on me. I still won't change my mind though."

Frieda examines him with a thoughtful stare.

"How come you're such a straight, good guy?"

"Is that bothering you?"

She shakes her head, "Never."

.

.

.

Carla notices their fingers interlacing to each other, and mentions that they are too old for that stuff. Zeke knows what she really meant was how outsiders would perceive that gesture.

"We're in relationship," says Frieda easily. Consequences be damned.

"My, my," Carla laughs nervously.

Later on, they spend some time watching movie in his room while waiting for the car to pick up Frieda. Carla insists for him to leave the door open—which never happened before—and regularly comes to check under the pretense of cleaning and delivering snacks.

When the car arrives, Frieda hugs him like she normally does. Zeke is not really sure whether her talking about them being in relationship was serious or just teasing. But then, she squeezes his hand, whispering in his ear.

"Come find me when you're done. I'm very good at waiting."

And Zeke knows, he will definitely come to get her. No matter what, he will.

.

.

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 **Tag**

Actually, Frieda is not good at waiting.

Six months after that, a day before his graduation, Frieda called to him from across the field.

As if seeing a mirage, Zeke dropped his baseball glove, leaving the game halfway while his whole team exchanging confused looks. There was an instant silence, and Colt Grice gave him a subtle thumb-up while chief Magath muttering something along the line of "lovefool".

Frieda grinned in her dress shirt and long skirt (always a proper girl), and the lines he had inside his head—whatever impressive they were—gone.

"You're supposed to be waiting but I don't think you're actually doing a good job at all," he heard himself saying that.

"I wanted to surprise you," Frieda said proudly.

"Great minds think alike."

"Huh?"

Zeke's lips twitched. He had never thought his baseball skill would attract scholarship, his one-way ticket to see her world...

"By the way, do you have a roommate?"


End file.
